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January 25, 20231 min read

Self importance is the enemy of growth

When many think of self importance, they think of arrogance. But the reality is that most of us are the most important in our own worlds to some degree- we think about ourselves endlessly- what others think about us, whether they like us, whether we will become afraid, if our feelings are hurt in a lesson by hearing uncomfortable feedback – it really is all about us.

As long as it is about us, we will perpetually draw energy away from growth, and back to our own self protection.

Most of us don’t mean to be self absorbed, but it’s a normal part of being human. It takes considerable self awareness (not the same as being self absorbed), a sense of humor, and the understanding that we are no better or no worse than another.

In my experience, the minute you can catch yourself in a stupid train of thought and laugh about it, you’re home free. Being human is absurd, and it’s a shared experience by all.

But as long as we’re worried about ourslelves- our image, our feelings, our worries, our whatever, we aren’t there for our students, our horses, or anyone. We have a limited cup to draw from.

When we forget about ourselves, when we see the commonalities in all and how silly, short sighted and usually wrong our own feelings and thoughts are, we can let go- and draw from observation of the moment. There is considerable power available in any moment, if we can get still enough for even a fleeting period of time, to notice it.

Amy Skinner

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